So, welcome again to my private courtroom, fellow jurors or counselors. In the next couple of WONDERFUL posts, I am going to present you my argument that German service SUCKS. They even have a term for it: Service-Wuste-Deutschland, that is, Service-Desert-Germany. You can be the defense, or the jurors, or both at the same time. Whatever side you pick, you are most welcome, as long as you express yourself respectfully towards others and their opinions.
In the next few weeks, I am going to post stories of things that happened to me/us in Germany. I admit that every one of these happenings shaked me, otherwise I would not have written them down. But I still wonder if I had a right to be upset about them: Was I being too sensitive? Had I gotten used to American Service too much (yes, with a well earned capital)? How were things in other countries, like Belgium? I remember my foreign friends having similar complaints about Belgium.
When I told my job coach that I was going to write about service in Germany on my blog, she was happy for it. She said: “I have to deal with this almost every single day, and I am happy that someone says something about it!” So, these posts are dedicated to her!
Case 1: The Career Service at the Johannes Gutenberg University
On our first trip to Mainz together, I guess it was August 2015, Frederik and I dropped by at the Johannes Gutenberg University. Frederik had a ton of paperwork to do before he could start his job. In Germany, you are not allowed to start your new job as long as not all paperwork is in order. So, we wanted to make sure that we were doing everything right.
At the International Office, we were greeted by a very friendly young guy, mid-twenties, welcoming Frederik and I to Mainz and the university in fluent English. He answered all our questions as much as possible and gave us tips where to look for answers or solutions. (Finding a place to live in Mainz was really a challenge, so all his tips were more than welcome, even though they did not work out.)
I asked him if they had any programs for the spouses of foreign scholars. He told me that unfortunately they had not, that they had noticed this problem and that they were working on it. They were trying to set up a collaboration with the Career Service to help out the spouses of the international scholars, but they hadn’t managed so far. “But”, said he, “why don’t you try your luck and go over there? You never know. It is on the third floor of x building.”
Walking out of his office, we both were optimistic and excited about the path ahead of us. This guy had been so friendly and helpful and it had felt great. It had felt like a real welcome to this new country. I guess we both thought “Everything is going to be alright” and “We made the right decision”. And I needed exactly that. Because, as you can imagine, it is very scary to uproot your life. As much as you think it through, as much as you weigh all the pros and cons, as much as you try to take into account everything that you can think of, for all your family members, it remains scary and painful and stressful to leave everything behind that is known to you. Again. And you hope that you made the right decision. And you pray that it will all work out. For everyone. But you don’t really know what you are getting yourselves into. And you are incredibly homesick all the time. So, you cling on to every friendly face helping you out.
After locating the building and getting to the third floor, we get in line at the Career Service. When it is my turn, I – still in my ecstatic state – tell the lady behind the counter – clearly not in an ecstatic state of mind – that my husband will start working for the university soon and that the international office where we just came from had suggested to come over here as they might be able to help me finding a job.
Her response was short in words and in tone: “You are wrong here”. For a split second, I thought I was at the wrong floor. I asked her why.
– Are you a student at the university here? Or are you planning to enroll at the university?
– No, I am not and I am not planning on it, but I also would not be here, if it wasn’t for my husband.
– Just a second.
She walked over to her boss and a second later, I saw her boss shaking her head: No. She walked back over to us.
– I cannot help you. You need to go to blablabla (I could not understand what she was saying as I had no idea what she was talking about).
And that was it. Frederik and I turned around, walked outside and I started crying.
After the warm welcome at the International Office, I simply wasn’t prepared for the cold shower ahead of us. And homesickness does not really help in being defensive. But even Frederik noticed the enormous difference in service between office number one and office number two. While number one greets you with a smile and a “Welcome to Germany”, number two does not greet you but just offers an annoyed face telling you without words: “What do you want?” Both Frederik and I were instantly homesick again after that encounter. We could not help but think about how this encounter would have been different in the States. We imagined it would go somewhat like this.
After waiting in line, a friendly, smiling person has the following conversation with us:
– Hi there, what can I do for you?
– Well, we have just arrived here in Germany. My husband starts working at the university here in October and I am looking for a job myself.
– Well, first of all, welcome to Germany to both of you. (INSERT MORE FRIENDLY SMALL TALK HERE). We are happy that you are here. Now, are you planning to enroll at the university?
– I wasn’t planning on it.
– Okay, well, unfortunately, at this time, the Career Service only helps students that are enrolled at the university. But we have made this information sheet with some other organizations that might be able to help you. Check out their websites and you will find a lot of information that will set you on your way.
Mind you, in the end, the answer is the same: We only serve students. But in the American scenario, you still feel welcome and you still get some help. In the German scenario, you feel most unwelcome. It is the difference between keeping the door open and slamming the door shut.
The more I thought about this afterwards, the more upset I became. It is not just the unfriendliness that bothers me, but also the narrow-mindedness behind it, the complete lack of community building that is so important to American universities, turning away the people who are supporting your own employees.
I am wondering what you make of this. Would you have been upset? Or not?
I am also wondering what the Career Service itself thinks of this. I am going to ask them.
It is such a simple difference between the response you received and the one that could have been…. and I hope you are right about the American response, and not being too generous. How valuable your input could be in helping Germany ‘get her shit together’. This should be an actual job. Unfortunately, the scenarios that need the most help are the ones that are least willing to accept it, or to see things from another perspective. And this makes everyones’ lives more miserable. But, writing about it and exposing it, is at least one small thing you can do in this hard world you have been thrown into. I only wish that it would help. Keep at it and keep believing it’s them and not you!
Oh I know those situations… french administration is the same. It gives you the feeling they actually do everything so you will leave the country. I found my self several times with tears in my eyes and and stomachpain.